To Be or Not To Be...

There is much talk lately about what it means to be a Christian. Who are we as Christians? What defines a complete/real/true “Christian”? And I too have struggled in this area. What does the word “Christian” mean for me?

Two writers have helped me tremendously when it comes to thinking in this area. Charlie Peacock and Brian McLaren. Mr. Peacock’s book “New Way to be Human” and Mr. McLaren’s book “A New Kind of Christian” have influenced much of my thought in this area. But first a little about me…

I’ve served as a pastor. For 9 years of my life folks referred to me as pastor or even the dreaded (at least for me) reverend. I served in the role of youth pastor most of the time I was working with churches and I served in a variety of ways. Professionally (full-time position in a church) through to volunteer leader in a small church. These were good times, even great some of the time. But I struggled with things often. I served within a group of churches that had some very specific expectations and even rules for what it meant to be a part of the group and especially what it meant to serve in leadership within the group. (stuff like "don't drink, smoke, swear, dance, or go with girls that do...) I committed myself to these rules (mostly) and even believed in some of them but I always questioned. Why the emphasis on outward signs of my inner life? Essentially the communication was… if you’re a “Christian” you won’t do this list of things.

I’m now not so sure that’s a good way to go. Actually I’m pretty convinced it’s not even quite what Jesus had in mind. I’ve come to a different, well maybe not different, maybe deeper understanding of being “Christian”.

Actually I don’t really refer to myself as a Christian much anymore. I am whole-heartedly, completely committed to living a life as someone who is following Jesus. That means Christian to most folks. But not to me. I’m totally committed to the local church (yes a Christian church) but I don’t like many of the things the “church” in the United States stands for or has stood for. I can’t claim Christianity like you would a membership in a club or society or association or political party (especially a political party). Being someone trying to follow Jesus is so completely more than those kinds of ideas or labels.

How I think of myself now, comes from prayer and thinking and reading. Charlie Peacock suggests that the new way to be human is to be a Student/Follower of Jesus. And that’s who I am. I follow Jesus as I would a master or a leader. Where he’s going, I want to go (please notice I use the present tense, Jesus is guiding today, actively). I’m a student of Jesus as I would be of a teacher or professor. He is teaching me today (through the Bible, through other reading, through people, through prayer). I can think of no greater description of whose I am. I am a student/follower of Jesus. Christianity, being a Christian has so much baggage for so many people, including myself. I want to follow Jesus. I want to be a student of Jesus. I want to do that seriously. Completely. I want to raise my children to pursue after a life of being a student/follower. I want my friends. I want everyone (quite literally) to be a student/follower of Jesus. Even if (maybe especially if), they never identify themselves as “Christain.”